Friday, June 10, 2011

--my tell..

The fact that love had been cruel to me in the past left me no choice but to keep it safely untouched for quite a long time. It has become a good reason for me to fail every sign of irresistible emotion.
DIDN'T want to hurt anyone again.
--it's just--
I can't permit my heart to beat longer..
not to any one.
.not anymore..

Yet, God is the wisest..He didn't allow any manto see his own heart-- such that my hand can neither hold nor control its beating. But then, thanks to Him--'coz if He did allow me, I certainly won't discover the entire language of love..

If only He permitted me to control the things I want to happen,


..Right now,I still don't believe in perfect match
..I still don't realize the value of waiting
..I would still search for fake happiness
..I would still hate the past and let it kill me

I still would face ordinary days..
I still would find reason to reject..
I still would envy those in-love..
I still won't accept my self..

and the worst thing of all...


all i can say for now is...

You've shown me the kind of love i never thought existing..
You gave me more than I asked in my prayers..
I still don't have enough to give back..
Please take it as your home..
MADE OF GLASS so please avoid dropping..
it won't be DEAF again 'coz..
you are locked inside..
forgive my clumsiness,
I lost the key..
no chance to escape.


  1. Sie said...
    no matter what you have gone through,no matter how unfair it was,it is over and done..your hon knows you are still healing..

    as what you have said "I still don't have enough to give back"..she is willing to help you repair every broken piece of your heart..whatever happens she will stay as your lover, friend and as an older sister..she is not asking more than what you can give her..she won't brake your heart made of glass..

    Thank You so much for giving her a CHANCE.She is willing to WAIT until you have Fully Recovered, Found your New Self and made WHOLE again :)
    Anonymous said...
    Bro.they are the ones who have hurt us.It is your past leave it there.Refocus on what you have now.You have her so it would be best if you completely move on for a new beginning.
    gracey said...
    Excellent piece from you kid.Your heart is made of glass but it can be unbreakable once you completely give all of your love and trust to my friend.You heart will not be broken again if you will also do your part in taking care of her heart.You discovered her? or a better way of saying God gave her to you.

    My friend is locked inside? Then take care of her so I won't be rescuing her.I trust you won't hurt her.
    Dai Ning Li said...
    "The fact that love had been cruel to me in the past left me no choice but to keep it safely untouched for quite a long time. It has become a good reason for me to fail every sign of irresistible emotion.
    I DIDN'T want to get hurt again."

    I share equal sentiment with your words, man. Anyhow, I am happy, I mean very very happy for whoever serves the reason why a sudden change came your way - why you embrace loving again and risk all that you have to be with that special someone.

    You both deserve genuine happiness.
    evelyn said...
    Lance is right Grandson.You have finally found her.She have won your heart because as the song says she loves you without condition, then it's your turn to win her heart.Grandson she has been through too much pain compared to the pain that you have felt.But look at her she still had a heart of loving and giving her all to you.She had no second thoughts of having a second chance.Move on and stay.
    David Scott said...
    Throughout life we experience tears and pains of the past, but if you want to be free stop remembering and making her remember the old wounds again.It causes her tearful pain.

    Believe - there is such thing as destiny and true love that last forever.If your past relationships didn't last it means someone else out there is worth more of your love and loves you more.

    Don't prioritize people who have made you their option Beanie.

    Love people who have made you their priority!

    Get ready Beanie - God has the best things in store for you! It is already there waiting!

    God has seen your painful past and He has now given you favor - He has given you the best and right person in your life so don't let her go - hold on to whom you have now Beanie.
    sudhi said...
    Beany what r u trying to say i'm not getting , r u both in a relationship or not???
    gracey said...
    I am reading it again word per word and there's something a bit wrong.It was mostly focused on your past and not on your feelings of who you are with now.Maybe I am wrong but you said you can't give enough which means you have not overcome your old past totally.

    Anyways open your mail.

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